do you share your dreams too soon?
cost of oversharing, building trust within yourself, courage to take your time
I only told three people in my life that I wanted to and will write a book: my sister, my husband, and my best friend. Even then, I didn’t tell them right away. I took my time-
until I knew no one could possibly convince me out of this path that I had already decided to take.
Because the truth is, our brains don’t like change and it only wants to protect us. It can make a good case for why we shouldn’t. So, sometimes, making that pros/cons list isn’t helpful. Sure, it may tease out some situations that we may have overlooked, but more than likely, our brain will come up with more cons than pros. And sometimes, even our friends and family will do the same. Not because they don’t love us, but they want to protect. They don’t want to see us disappointed and hurt. Their encouragement and care looks a lot like a big caution tape with a list of things for us to consider before jumping.
And suddenly, you aren’t quite sure why you would even dream of such. Doubt seeps in.
I have experienced this exact thing before and it left me crushed. So I knew I wanted to enter this path of writing and publishing differently. Rather than telling all my friends about it, I didn’t tell anyone for months until I could say to myself, “I am doing this thing and no one will change my mind.”
Take care of your dreams tenderly and fiercely.
Water it, nurture it, get to know it.
Get to know your dreams intimately before someone else does it for you.
Exploring, planning, journaling was the way I spent time with my dreams alone until it was time to let people in. I believe starting this way was one of the most beneficial and loving thing I did for myself as a person and why it has felt so different this time around. Yes, there were still times of stress and anxiety, but underneath the up and down emotions, there was a strong foundation of trust in myself and this path.
When I told the three people in my life, I shared from a space of knowing, not exploring.
And with this kind of demeanor, there was nothing for them to do then to fully support me. I had also saved myself of a lot of opinions if I had shared with everyone. These opinions would then turn into voices that would loom over my head and heart,
eventually losing my own voice. If you can’t hear your own voice clearly, then there are too many others you are listening to.
When we share our dreams too soon, our own voice gets lost in the midst of others
When we share our dreams too soon, we are too open to every single opinion
When we share our dreams too soon, our emotions are too high and we may not be able to receive wisdom and direction
Often people fear not sharing because it may jeopardize potential networking opportunities because you just never know who might be able to help you. I definitely see this point and certainly, community and networks is important. But, you get to decide when.
You get to decide when it’s safe to do so. And those who want to help and guide you in this new path, they will be there. There is no rush.
words for when you are holding a new dream
If a new dream has been planted, or you have been watering it for a while, I hope you know you don’t have to be in a rush to share it with the world. You can be selfish to hold on, just for yourself, until you are ready to let go and let some people in. I hope these words help you to breathe if you are in a season of planting, dreaming, and getting to know.
i am taking care of my dreams by protecting them.
what i think about my dreams matters more than what others think of them.
i don’t have to tell the whole world for my dreams to be real.
when i am ready to share, i know support will be waiting for me.
i can take as long as i want in this season of planting.
wishing you a gentle week,
kyunghee
“Exploring, planning, journaling was the way I spent time with my dreams alone until it was time to let people in. I believe starting this way was one of the most beneficial and loving thing I did for myself as a person and why it has felt so different this time around. Yes, there were still times of stress and anxiety, but underneath the up and down emotions, there was a strong foundation of trust in myself and this path.”
This. Is. Powerful!!!!!!
I really appreciate this insight.