Hello,
What name do you call yourself when you are meeting someone new?
Titles have a way of providing us with a sense of purpose, stability, and certainly self-worth.
But, what if I told you, you are more than________. (fill in the blank)
The roles we play are engrained in us. I am not saying this is bad because it’s amazing to do work that has purpose. But, to rely our self-worth fully on the roles we play comes with a cost of feeling empty and purposeless without them.
Who am I if I am not a teacher making a difference to young lives every day? Who am I if I am not contributing financially to my family? I am struggling to find my place after decades of stability.
I wonder if this is how retired people feel initially or when people become empty nesters or when that job they loved so much is taken. Maybe you’ve been there, or are there right now.
So, I started running again. When I’m running, I feel free. I don’t feel like a writer, a wife, daughter, or anyone else, but me. It’s a relationship with myself. Every run is different and it keeps me on my toes in a good way.
I know this isn’t a grand answer in finding a sense of self, but it can be a start. Hobbies. An overlooked self-care practice. Something you do where you are free from expectations or when life is uncertain.
You don’t have to be good at it, you just have to enjoy it. And this enjoyment allows us to see we are more than the roles we play, the call we are waiting for, the job we’ve applied for, you name it.
Hobbies are one of those seemingly small things that has the power to transform our lives in positive ways. Whether it renews our energy, engages us in a community, gives us alone time, or like me- maybe it allows you to expand your sense of identity that isn’t tied to your productivity.
So…
What activity feels freeing to do? (Do more of it)
What is something you want to explore, but you are worried that it might be a little out of place for someone like you? (Listen to your curiosity)
Happy February friends. I hope this month is gentle to you and you find a sense of self in something that feels grounding when life feels unpredictable.
with love,
kyunghee
For me, this answer is always writing. It's the thing that makes me feel most like myself.
Thank you for asking. I'm curious how you would answer too :)
Hobbies and interests are also where you find your peeps!